The Personal Statement: Top Five Mistakes

The “personal statement.” For many students, just seeing these words causes a spike in anxiety and stress. In just 650 words, you have to show perfect strangers who you are, set yourself apart from thousands of other applicants, and convince college admissions officers why they should want you on their campus. That’s a lot of ground to cover in what is essentially a one-page document! You also need to avoid falling into some of the many traps that might lead admissions officers to overlook your essay—and with it, the rest of your application.

In previous blog posts, we’ve told you what makes for a strong personal statement. Now, we’re laying out five of the most common personal statement mistakes we see each year to help you avoid making them in your own work.

TOP FIVE PERSONAL STATEMENT MISTAKES

1. MAKING YOUR PERSONAL STATEMENT TOO “PERSONAL“

As the Common App notes, the personal statement gives you a chance to show admissions officers who you are “apart from courses, grades, and test scores.” In this piece of writing, you can tell officers about your work as a scholar or an activist, about how you overcame a major challenge or made a wonderful new discovery.

Be careful, however, not to drift from personal into confessional. This is not the space to reveal deep dark secrets or to highlight information that you’d normally only share with close friends. Ask yourself, “If an admissions officer were interviewing me in person, is this something I would feel comfortable discussing with them?” If the answer is no, then that may be a sign that you’re crossing the line into confessional territory. This will not benefit you in the admissions process.

2. PICKING A PROBLEMATIC TOPIC

When writing your essay, you’ll want to focus on a compelling subject. There are lots of great topics you might consider (your fascinating historical research project, your great work on Student Council, etc.), but you’ll want to make sure to avoid:

Clichéd subjects that admissions officers have read about thousands of times before. “The big game,” “the eye-opening community service project,” “my grandma, the role model”—admissions officers have seen countless versions of these essays, so unless you have some unique twist on the genre, you are better off picking a different topic.
Offering your resume in essay form. It’s impressive that you have accomplished a lot, but your essay isn’t the place to provide a laundry list of achievements. Save that for the Activities section of the Common App, and use your personal essay to focus in on one or two accomplishments that really speak to who you are as a person.
Coming across as self-congratulatory. Admissions officers look for students who have both accomplishments and humility. While it’s great to highlight your achievements, make sure that you aren’t overly boastful when discussing them. If you are unsure that you’ve struck the right balance, read over your essay and ask yourself whether it sounds like it was written by someone you’d want as a friend and classmate.

3. FORGETTING YOUR LARGER STORY

As we’ve noted before, admissions officers often spend just a few minutes reviewing each application, trying to get a quick sense of who each applicant is. With this in mind, it can be helpful to think of your application as an elevator pitch for yourself—a collection of materials that underscores the most important points about you.

Before you begin writing, we encourage you to consider what makes you stand out as an applicant. Are you a brilliant creative writer? A chemist who has won multiple science fairs? An advocate for others who has championed a cause close to your heart? Whatever it is that makes you a compelling applicant—that should be the focus of your essay. Writing about another topic risks muddying your “pitch” and preventing admissions officers from forming a clear sense of who you are as a student.

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4. NOT PROOFREADING

Proofreading your work shows admissions officers that you are a thoughtful student who takes the application process seriously. If you submit an essay riddled with typographical errors, admissions officers may assume that you are a poor writer or a disinterested applicant—even if your ideas are otherwise brilliant! To make sure that your essay serves you well, review it carefully for grammatical and spelling errors before you click submit. If you can, ask one or two other people to review it and look for any errors you may have missed.

This brings us to our final mistake:

5. LETTING TOO MANY COOKS INTO THE KITCHEN

It’s a good idea to get some feedback on your essay, especially from people who know the admissions process well. There is, however, such a thing as too much feedback. If you ask lots of people for their insights, you may end up with a ton of contradictory and unhelpful information. Keep in mind, too, that the personal statement is a relatively unusual genre. Even people who know good writing, like your English teacher, may not know what makes for a stellar college essay.

To ensure that you are putting together the strongest essay possible, we encourage you to work with someone who has experience with the college application process. If you need additional support, we’re here to help.

Dr. Eliza Fox

Senior Private Counselor at Top Tier Admissions

Eliza has years of experience at Top Tier Admissions, helping students gain admittance to top-flight colleges and pioneering the Writing Center. She holds a B.A. in English with Honors and Distinction from Stanford University, where she was a two-time recipient of Stanford’s Rebele Journalism Fellowship. She earned her MA and PhD in English Literature at the University of Virginia. Prior to working at Top Tier, Eliza taught in UVa’s English Department and its Academic and Professional Writing Program. The effectiveness of her teaching and her commitment to her students earned her multiple awards, including the All-University Graduate Teaching Award and honors from UVa’s Seven Society. Eliza’s own writing has appeared in publications ranging from academic journals to The Philadelphia Inquirer. She also has experience in publishing, digital humanities, and study abroad programming.